Escape, Act II

 Cocktail Correspondent: Annonymous

Escape Act II (The Purple Paradise Song)

Annonymous

I was tired of my manny

We ate too much junk food

Too many piña coladas

And the sand spoiled the mood

So while he was unsandin’

I checked Bumble and Hinge

And in all of the profiles

There was this one I would binge

If you like Purple Paradise

And yeah I know it is sweet

But it goes well with nachos

So why don’t we meet

If you like sleeping sound at midnight

In your bed in your house

Then I’m the love that you’ve looked for

Come to me with your blouse

I didn’t think about the old guy

He was missing half a brain

The midnight dunes drove me crazy

Just felt like the same old dull refrain

So I went to my Bumble

Wrote down my personal pitch

And though I’m nobody’s poet

I thought it was pretty rich

Yes, I like Purple Paradise

Although it is a bit sweet

But it goes well with nachos

So come on and let’s meet

I’ve got to meet you by tomorrow noon

And cut through all this red tape

At a bar called O’Craftey’s

Where we’ll plan our escape

So I waited with high hopes

And he walked in the place

I saw him smile in an instant

At last I saw a new face

He was so lovely and witty

And he said, “Oh, it’s you”

Then we laughed for a moment

And I said, “I always knew”

“That I hate piña coladas

But I don’t mind the rain

I love the feel of the ocean

But not the taste of champagne

I hate making love at midnight

Too much sand on my cape

You’re the man I have looked for

Come with me and escape”

If you hate piña coladas

But you don’t mind the rain

If you sometimes do yoga

And you have a real brain

If you like sleeping sound at midnight

In your bed in your house

I’m the love that you’ve looked for

Come with me be my spouse

Yes, I hate piña coladas

But I don’t mind the rain

I eat nothing but health food

I don’t care for champagne

I'm glad I met you yesterday at noon

And moved on from the cape

At a bar called O'Craftey's

Come with me and escape

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Location: Craft, 85 West 1st Avenue, Vancouver, BC

Drink: 1oz Captain Morgan white rum, Ube cream liqueur, pineapple, coconut, lime

Date: Friday, September 13, 2024